Dueling Gas in the Men's Room

[David Cronin]

imagine if he fucking gives you like a dollar tip. LOL. I would not be
able to do that job. I wonder why anyone in the whole friggin world takes
a job like that.Mike.

I recently visited Harrods (in London for the geographically
challenged) and had to pay one pound sterling for the honour of doing
a dump. Well i'd been travelling the world for about six months, and
had my share of gastro, constipation, etc. I'd done some extremely
large shits too, such as that time in Equador where I blocked the
toilet with a particularly large mega-grogan(tm) and then continued to
use the said appliance for the next 4 days, in which I had to keep
pushing the turds further down into the bowl to make room for their
younger brown brothers to be born. I used a coathanger for this task
which I naturally returned to the wardrobe for the next happy
customer. It got to the point where I had to leave the festering hole
that they called a hotel in search of another place to stay, since the
toilet had filled to capacity... but I digress.
Back to Harrods. The toilet attendant there does everything for you
EXCEPT wipe your arse. He turns the tap on for you, hands you a
towel, opens and closes the door for you, supplies aftershave, etc.
What is at least slightly tasteless is the fact that immediately you
leave the stall after dropping your dump, he checks the toilet to
ensure that there is still paper and that you have not left skiddies
or a blockage. He does this within seconds of you leaving the stall.
On this particular occasion i'd been eating meat pies and drinking
beer the day before, and the stench of my crap was bad enough to bring
tears to the eyes and even the hardiest sewerage worker (my crap was
black, hard and greasy). Does this guy get off on the smell or what?
Is it wank fodder for him? Does he duck into a stall for a quick
sniff and a wank before greeting the next Harods customer? Does he
have little holes drilled to watch, etc, etc? Perhaps he's got the
entire collection of Choc Shit Lovers videos at home?
I'm now convinced that the reason these people become toilet
attendants is to get off on shit. They're all feco-fetishists(tm).
Remember this when you next go to public toilets!
Devo.

Wow I wrote this post 21 years ago... and I can still smell it!

Devo

[Pancho Valvejob]

Post by David Cronin

imagine if he fucking gives you like a dollar tip. LOL. I would not be
able to do that job. I wonder why anyone in the whole friggin world takes
a job like that.Mike.

I recently visited Harrods (in London for the geographically
challenged) and had to pay one pound sterling for the honour of doing
a dump. Well i'd been travelling the world for about six months, and
had my share of gastro, constipation, etc. I'd done some extremely
large shits too, such as that time in Equador where I blocked the
toilet with a particularly large mega-grogan(tm) and then continued to
use the said appliance for the next 4 days, in which I had to keep
pushing the turds further down into the bowl to make room for their
younger brown brothers to be born. I used a coathanger for this task
which I naturally returned to the wardrobe for the next happy
customer. It got to the point where I had to leave the festering hole
that they called a hotel in search of another place to stay, since the
toilet had filled to capacity... but I digress.
Back to Harrods. The toilet attendant there does everything for you
EXCEPT wipe your arse. He turns the tap on for you, hands you a
towel, opens and closes the door for you, supplies aftershave, etc.
What is at least slightly tasteless is the fact that immediately you
leave the stall after dropping your dump, he checks the toilet to
ensure that there is still paper and that you have not left skiddies
or a blockage. He does this within seconds of you leaving the stall.
On this particular occasion i'd been eating meat pies and drinking
beer the day before, and the stench of my crap was bad enough to bring
tears to the eyes and even the hardiest sewerage worker (my crap was
black, hard and greasy). Does this guy get off on the smell or what?
Is it wank fodder for him? Does he duck into a stall for a quick
sniff and a wank before greeting the next Harods customer? Does he
have little holes drilled to watch, etc, etc? Perhaps he's got the
entire collection of Choc Shit Lovers videos at home?
I'm now convinced that the reason these people become toilet
attendants is to get off on shit. They're all feco-fetishists(tm).
Remember this when you next go to public toilets!
Devo.

Wow I wrote this post 21 years ago... and I can still smell it!
Devo

shit post.